THE THREAD | Couples

COUPLES

This one holds hands, fingers tangled, while walking down the sidewalk, but at home, doors closed, goes no further. This one is a tangled mess of flesh in the dark, but on the sidewalk can’t hardly look each other in the eye without blushing. This one makes faces at one another – puckered lips, or crossed eyes, or bucked teeth, or chipmunk cheeks – but only when certain no one else is looking. This one agrees to disagree over libertarianism. This one, over vegetarianism. This one over the essence of -isms. This one disagrees almost daily over where the cat can or should or will sleep. This one watches comedy shows on television every night, sitting close on the couch, and, over the course of the past decade, has gradually synced their laughter closer toward unity in timing but greater dissonance in pitch and tone. This one is fascinated by and seeks out the details of each other's workdays and has made a sport of dramatizing even the most mundane office events with the hopes of drawing smiles and empathy from one another. This one wants to talk about anything other than work. This one eats dinner at Garozzo's Ristorante every Thursday night where the servers wonder amongst themselves why a word is rarely spoken at the table, though it is privately shared in common between the two at the table that the chance to be with someone you don’t have to speak to is the greatest pleasure of all. This one eats tacos every Tuesday, but at home, where it’s cheaper. This one plays pick-up sand volleyball in the park twice a week during the summer, though always on opposing teams, having learned that in sport they are better off as adversaries than as teammates. This one, feeling cute and close one afternoon while shopping in the mall, bought a tandem kayak, and upon their first excursion to the lake the following weekend immediately regretted their purchase. This one talks about their emotional states daily at bedtime. This one, maybe once a month, with purpose and precision. This one, haphazardly via phone calls and messages throughout their daytime hours spent apart. This one lives apart, separated by five county lines, yet are convinced they share a sliver of one another’s mind. This one clearly defines and regularly renegotiates their roles. This one relies heavily on traditional religious views to help define their roles. This one relies heavily on the latest popular forms of rejecting traditional religious views to define their roles. This one gives lip service to equality in theory but can’t escape the deep ruts prior examples have plowed out ahead of them. This one is still trying to plan that trip overseas but those other lands are just so big and time so small. This one wonders about life with other people. This one wonders about a life of solitude. This one knows it is all over, yet often thinks about canned goods keeping in the pantry well beyond the stated date. This one is surprised almost daily how something so worn as old love can feel so fresh. This one tosses popcorn at each other’s gaping mouths across the table. This one has a private joke between them that goes, “They’re off in the Himalayas!” but they no longer remember the joke’s origin. This one takes turns asking for the others' thoughts on something they’ve been thinking about lately. This one wonders often what other couples talk about.

(Artwork: The Kiss by Gustav Klimt)

Good morning! After a slow and stumbling-through-a-foot-of-snow start to the New Year, I think I’m finding my footing. So I’m sending this to you today with the hopes of declaring one of these dadgum intentions: Starting next Wednesday, I will resume sending The Thread regularly, consistently, more often.

I’ve been writing a lot, and I look forward to sharing it here. Thank you, as always, for reading, sharing, and responding. The Thread is a newsletter that allows me to share my writing directly with folks who want to read it, and it really is a gift to have a way to share without algorithms, gatekeepers, or costs getting in the way. The subscription to The Thread has been and will remain free, but I really do appreciate the folks who chip in a few bucks every month to support my writing financially. If that’s something you are interested in, you can “Become a Paid Subscriber” here:

Looking forward onward inward upward evermore,

Andrew